Traveling With a Baby and a Toddler: What I Wish I Knew Before Our First Flight

An inexperienced mom’s honest guide to surviving the airport with a toddler and a newborn.

I am not the mom who has been traveling with kids since they were six weeks old. I am not the mom who has a perfectly organized packing system or who magically gets out the door on time.

Quite the opposite, actually.

Between my postpartum depression (PPD) and my husband’s work schedule, we are JUST NOW traveling for the first time ever with kids. And by kids, I mean an almost 3-year-old and a 9-week-old baby.

So, naturally, I have thoughts.

Here is everything I would want another mom to know before her first trip with kids, starting with the airport edition. These are the things that worked for us, the things I would absolutely do again, and a few things I would do differently next time.

1. Let go of literally ALL the expectations

Sleep. Naps. Meals. Behavior. Your carefully curated routine.

All of it.

We knew we’d be out of our element, and we knew our usual routine was going to get thrown off. Expecting everything to run exactly as it does at home would have been setting ourselves up for frustration.

Our toddler actually got sick while we were away, which obviously wasn’t part of the plan. We made sure we had appropriate medications available for the kids, and our friends were able to help us fill in a few gaps with things they already had at home.

Next time, I’ll build out our travel sick kit a little more intentionally.

And a note for anyone traveling with a newborn: check medication plans with your pediatrician before the trip. Fever in a baby younger than 3 months needs prompt medical evaluation, and you shouldn’t give a newborn fever medication unless their clinician specifically directs you to.

Things are going to happen. Someone might miss a nap. Someone might have a meltdown. Someone might get sick.

You can prepare for the things you can control without expecting the entire trip to go perfectly.

2. Check your bags. Seriously.

We used to be the couple who could strategically pack carry-on bags for a six-day trip. We were good at it.

But the thought of lugging a toddler, a newborn, AND everyone’s luggage through the airport sounded like my personal hell.

So we packed both kids into one checked bag, my husband and me into another, and each carried a backpack. We also packed a little backpack for our toddler.

Was checking bags an extra expense? Yes.

Did it make getting through the airport with two tiny humans significantly more manageable? Also yes.

Sometimes the goal isn’t to pack the most efficiently. Sometimes the goal is to make your life easier, and I’m learning that those are not always the same thing.

3. AirTags. Everywhere.

In our checked bags. In our backpacks. On the toddler.

Okay, maybe not literally everywhere, but close enough.

For us, the peace of mind was worth the money. I liked being able to keep track of our luggage and have another way to locate our toddler if we ever got separated.

Obviously, an AirTag is not a substitute for keeping your eyes on your child, but I am absolutely keeping them in our travel routine.

A digital leash, if you will.

4. TSA PreCheck is worth it if you travel often

Our kids were eligible to accompany us through TSA PreCheck because they were traveling with us and were under 12.

The only problem? I let MY PreCheck expire.

So we had to go through the regular security line on the way there anyway. 🙃

We had it sorted out for the flight home, and the difference was noticeable.

If you know you’re going to travel regularly, I’d seriously consider it. Just make sure your own membership is active before you leave, because apparently that reminder was not for everyone. It was for me.

12/10. Would recommend.

5. Babywearing and shoulder rides made getting around SO much easier

I wore our 9-week-old in the Ergobaby Embrace, and my husband carried our toddler on his shoulders.

This worked especially well because we weren’t also trying to maneuver carry-on suitcases.

I love the Ergobaby Embrace because it’s lightweight and easy to get on and off. When you have a newborn, a toddler, and approximately 47 things to keep track of, easy matters.

Neither kid was interested in a stroller, but bringing a travel stroller is absolutely an option if yours will tolerate one!

The bigger takeaway? Think about how you’re going to physically move everyone through the airport BEFORE you get there.

6. Give your toddler their own backpack

This was one of my favorite decisions.

Our toddler felt SO important carrying his own little backpack, and it gave him a few things to focus on while we navigated the airport.

We packed:

• A Yoto Mini (we got ours on sale!)
• Headphones with a volume limit of 76 dB
• Mini off-brand Magna-Tiles
• A coloring book
• Snacks

Nothing groundbreaking. Just a few familiar, easy-to-grab things that gave him something to do besides asking if we were there yet.

I also liked that everything was in one place instead of scattered across three adult bags.

Would absolutely do this again.

7. Have a car seat plan BEFORE you leave

This one is a little more complicated.

We chose not to bring our car seats because we’d seen stories about seats getting damaged during air travel. We were staying with friends who had car seats available, so that was our plan for transportation at our destination.

For our next trip, we’ll be researching baby gear rentals in advance, too.

One important note: this is what we chose for our particular trip, not a blanket recommendation to travel without your own car seats. Using an appropriate, correctly installed car seat is important for vehicle safety, and bringing an FAA-approved restraint on the plane for a child who has their own seat can be the safest option during the flight.

If you’re renting or borrowing one at your destination, confirm that it’s appropriate for your child’s age, height, and weight, and that you’ll have access to it before you need to get in a car.

Basically, don’t leave this decision until you’re standing at baggage claim with two tired kids.

8. Don’t pack a week’s worth of diapers if you don’t need to

We brought enough diapers for the travel day and bought the rest once we arrived.

Because we were staying with friends and had access to a car, this was easy for us. If you won’t have a vehicle, you could look into grocery delivery at your destination instead.

Diapers take up SO much room, especially when you’re packing for two kids, and I was happy to leave that extra space for other things.

Obviously, bring enough for the journey plus a buffer for delays. The goal is to pack less, not to end up stranded in an airport with one diaper and a prayer.

9. Get an extra set of hands on travel day

If you have someone who can come over and help with the chaos before you leave, ASK THEM.

I know this isn’t feasible for everyone, but if you have a neighbor, a friend, or your new mom friend who owes you a favor, this is a good time to cash it in.

We have a mother’s helper/house manager who managed the kids while my husband and I handled everything else.

And honestly? Worth it.

Full transparency, we were STILL late. But that had less to do with the kids and more to do with both of us having 80 HDs, time blindness, and absolutely no packing system.

So, you know. We’re a work in progress.

10. Do it for the memories, not the break

This might honestly be the biggest one.

We did not go into this trip expecting to come home rested, rejuvenated, or feeling like we’d had a vacation from parenting.

Because we were still parenting. Just in a different location.

There were still diapers. Feeds. Snacks. Toddler needs. Logistics. All the usual things, just without the comforts and systems we have at home.

And we were okay with that.

We wanted to make memories as a family, see our friends, and do something outside our normal routine. We knew it was going to take more work than traveling before kids, and we were cool with that.

I think that mindset made the entire experience more fun.

Was it effortless? Absolutely not.

Would I do it again? Yes.

And next time, I get to be a slightly more experienced mom traveling with a baby and a toddler.

Which is basically a seasoned professional at this point, right?

Final thoughts

If you’re about to take your first trip with a baby and a toddler, here’s your permission slip to make things easier wherever you can.

Check the bags. Ask for help. Buy the snacks. Pack the little backpack. Let the routine go a little. Make the memories.

You do not have to be the mom who has it all figured out before you leave the house.

Clearly, I wasn’t.

And we still did it.

Here’s to doing the things that feel a little intimidating, making memories with our kids, and figuring it out as we go.